“Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see.” -- John W. Whitehead, The Stealing of America, 1983

Michael
Behind these beautiful evergreen eyes, lies a wounded and frightened child whose young life has been filled with chaos and horror.

Meet Michael, an inquisitive nine year old boy who arrived at Youth Haven over three months ago. Michael and his two older siblings were taken from the home of their drug & alcohol abusing mother and physically abusive father when Michael was just three years old. They bounced from relative to relative while Mom tried hard to turn her life around and put the drug abuse behind her. Her hard work paid off and she was ultimately reunited with her children but suddenly and tragically died of a massive heart attack. Michael was five years old.

With Mom dead and their father in jail, the children went to live with their elderly grandparents. The grandfather died shortly after the children went to their home and then unbelievable but true, their grandmother, with whom Michael was extremely bonded, died only two years later. Depressed and angry Michael, now 7, along with his brother & sister, were then taken in by an aunt and uncle. Fearful of bonding with yet another parental figure and unable to cope with his painful past, Michael’s behavior became intensely impulsive, aggressive and suicidal. While in the aunt & uncle’s home he began to self-mutilate himself and once tried to hang himself. He became disruptive at school, fighting with classmates, talking back to teachers and refusing to do homework.

The aunt and uncle finally gave up and Michael is at Youth Haven now. When asked why he was trying to hurt himself and others, this innocent child whose young life has been rife with pain and trauma responded solemnly, “I’m angry because my whole family is dead.”

Michael is meeting others with painful backgrounds and relating well to structure, support and nurturance. He laughs with other children and appears on the outside to be enjoying a life of childhood simplicity. He goes to school everyday, although he continues to have emotional problems there that manifest in difficulty with teachers. Math and gym class are his favorites and he hopes to join the marching band when he enters high school.

James
James is advanced in some unusual ways for his age. He’s 9 now and can explain in great detail how to cook powder to make crack cocaine. His own personal dresser drawer at home stored big “gars,” as he calls it, and explains that these are pot smokers as big as cigars placed there to hide them from the law. James stays with us at Youth Haven now and the best thing about it so far, he says, is that he has real meals and a bed to sleep on. He doesn’t feel sorry for himself and never had a dad so he really doesn’t miss one. James explained that his mom would get sick a lot and would drag their home’s only mattress out into the living room, so he just slept on the floor and didn’t mind one bit. We are so proud of James; he’s really handsome and has an aptitude for art. This charming child, who bragged of being good at cooking crack for his mom, is helping cook food for all the children in the shelter. Last week his mother called to tell James not to feel bad about all the lies he was being made to tell.

Gabriel
Gabriel is a blonde with beautiful pale blue eyes. He is three. His mom is 16 and in a juvenile detention facility. He lives in an on and off again relationship with his parental grandmother who is 33, single and according to her, really does not want, nor can she afford, to care for Gabriel. Gabe is sad and mad. He spits, curses, kick and cries so much it breaks your heart. He gets awards here for being a good eater and having the greatest smile. We think he likes the awards – a lot!

Jane
Jane was so frightened when she arrived at Youth Haven. Removed from her parent’s home because an uncle sexually abused her, she cried herself to sleep for the entire first week. She has big dimples and blond hair and has seen a lot of trouble for her seven years. After a haircut last week, her Mother told her she looked ugly and so Jane cried and wore a hat to school. Her mom cannot help it, as she has a disease, but to Jane, she does not seem to want her. There are four other siblings all abandoned, so why would one more, this 7-year old girl, matter? Jane somehow knows all this and her sadness is real. She smiles more and more though, as the staff give her lots of support. Her bed is always clean and fresh and her clothes new and pretty. She always has allowance money and, we feel, Jane is finally beginning to feel secure in her Haven home.

Kathryn
Kathryn lived at Youth Haven for a long while. She was used to living in different places, because her family moved a lot. Every time Kathryn went to the doctor for a broken bone, her family moved right away. She explained to us that one arm had been in a cast two times, and each of her legs in casts one time each, although not all at the same time, she was quick to add. She was sure that her daddy didn’t mean to hurt her; he just didn’t remember how strong he was. Her mommy couldn’t stop him because she was afraid. The last time, before Youth Haven, the doctors had to keep her in the hospital. That time, her parents moved without her. She still misses them, wherever they are.